1. |
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Honey, did you read the news?
Page seven, next to 'Alley Oop.'
Another couple on the run
Who packed a picnic and a gun.
Isn't that romantic, dear?
We once had the same idear.
Things like that get set aside;
A dream deferred not death defied.
We could be lovers on the lam.
We'd rob a bank or two or perpetrate a scam.
We'd steal a fancy car and go for a ride
And we'd die side-by-side like Bonnie and Clyde.
At least that's what I thought we'd do
Back when I first married you.
Though we're old, I'm still not sold
It's too late to try.
We're walkin' a tightrope
For the first time in our lives.
We played it safe, it's safe to say,
Until this very day.
Won't you please elope with me
As if we were twenty-three?
A little bit more time is all we need.
We never sailed the seven seas;
Or built a jungle fortress high up in the trees;
Or wrestled lions in the African plains;
Or fought the Fascists back in Civil War Spain.
Are you happy anyway?
Do you think we've done okay?
There's still time for us to find
Our ticket to fame.
We're walkin' a tightrope
For the first time in our lives.
We played it safe, it's safe to say,
Until this very day.
Won't you please elope with me
As if we were twenty-three?
A little bit more time is all we need.
We had our opportunities
To fly up to the moon and see what we could see.
Instead you built a swing in our little yard;
You pushed me up at night and showed me the stars.
I guess what I am trying to say is
I wouldn't trade a single day.
I'd rather find you by my side
Than picnic on Mars.
We're walkin' a tightrope
For the first time in our lives.
We played it safe, it's safe to say,
Until this very day.
Won't you please elope with me
As if we were twenty-three?
A little bit more time is all we need.
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2. |
LOL Funny
04:00
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I'm not playing hard to get
That's a method I don't get
I'm not trying to lead you on
That's not in my lexicon
Though you're handsome and we've had our share of fun
You'll never mean so much that my mascara runs
Glad you thought that this was great
I just can't reciprocate
You can blame it on my youth
Doesn't mean it's not the truth
You're funny but you're not ha ha funny
I love you but I don't la la love you
You're not completely incomplete
You're nice, you're pleasant, hey, you're neat!
That's a real important start
To winning someone else's heart
Rest assured I'll always hold in fond regard
The time when, as you say, I tore your soul apart
No, it's nothing that you've done
Not everyone can be the one
You can work on what you lack
But till then don't call me back
You're funny but you're not ha ha funny
I love you but I don't la la love you
When I find the man I love for eternity
I'll explain your role in my biography
Then he'll call you up to tell you earnestly:
"Thank you, pal, you prepared her well for me"
I'll reminisce about you right before I die
Along with hundreds more who flash before my eyes
You're funny but you're not ha ha funny
I love you but I don't la la love you
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3. |
Poor, Poor Thing
04:02
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When you're in love, it always seems ubiquitous
Then when you're out, the feeling never sticks with us
At least, not enough
You can't recall the feeling that you know you miss
Missing itself's the only thing that still persists
So let's reminisce
Poor thing, you poor, poor thing
Look at you, you little sad sack
Someday this won't seem bad at all
Nuzzle your face into mine
And I will hold you tight
I'll brush the hair out of your eyes
And then I'll tuck you in for the night
You poor, poor thing
It's been a while since you were out there on your own
The size of your sighs and groans has grown now you're alone
With the dial tone
Talk to me as we tour your old familiar haunts
Make me a list of all you'll miss now that she's gone
Cry if you want
Poor thing, you poor, poor thing
Look at you, you little sad sack
Someday this won't seem bad at all
Nuzzle your face into mine
And I will hold you tight
I'll brush the hair out of your eyes
And then I'll tuck you in for the night
You poor, poor thing
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4. |
Prehistoric Bears
03:53
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Why did the teddy bear survive
When the mighty stegosaurus didn't make it out alive?
Why does the raptor pass away
When Fuzzy Wuzzy doesn't? Does he ever see his day?
If volcanoes caused the dinos to expire
We know bears are well prepared to deal with forest fire.
If a lack of food put T. Rex in his casket
Every bear knows what to do: steal a pic-a-nic basket.
Why was the teddy bear unharmed
When the brontosaurus long before us had to buy the farm?
Why did the polar bear not die
When the woolly mammoth kicked the can as soon as ice arrived?
If the climate changed too hot or cold at night
For Baby Bear, the air out there would have been just right.
If an asteroid had blocked out all the light
They'd wrap themselves in blankets and snuggle for the night.
This much is uncontested fact:
What bears had but dinos always lacked
Was human folk to love them;
To worship and draw pictures of them.
To show how much they cared
They even formed a clan of the cave bear.
If you want to know about the clan
A book and film with Daryl Hannah
Tells it better than I can
Equipped with cello and piano.
Like the dinosaurs I'm dying too
Cause I've lost that human love I used to get from you.
So if you care about me like you say
You would love me like a bear and then you would stay.
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5. |
I'm Writing a Song
02:42
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I'm writing a song about the time that you broke my heart
I'm trying to turn the pain into some kind of therapeutic art
I hope that it'll seem okay
Cause I'm kind of in an emo way
I am writing a song cause you broke my heart
I'm taking the thoughts that I have had and I'll sort them into rhymes
Though I don't know the words to sing I'm sure they'll come to me in time
My songs are always kind of tame
But the heartaches in them all the same
I am writing a song cause you broke my heart
You need eloquence and warm melodic flow
I can hardly write but I know how love songs go
I'm writing a song about the time that you walked out on me
I'm taking pains to keep it plain, not masked in irony
The record's coming out tonight
I will gladly sign if you like
Cause I wrote this song when you broke my heart
You need eloquence and warm melodic flow
I can hardly write but I know how love songs go
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6. |
Illinois
03:10
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By thy rivers gently flowing, Illinois, Illinois,
O'er thy prairies verdant growing, Illinois, Illinois,
Comes an echo on the breeze.
Rustling through the leafy trees,
And its mellow tones are these, Illinois, Illinois,
And its mellow tones are these, Illinois.
From a wilderness of prairies, Illinois, Illinois,
Straight thy way and never varies, Illinois, Illinois,
Till upon the inland sea,
Stands thy great commercial tree,
Turning all the world to thee, Illinois, Illinois,
Turning all the world to thee, Illinois.
Not without thy wondrous story, Illinois, Illinois,
Can be writ the nation's glory, Illinois, Illinois,
On the record of thy years,
Abraham Lincoln's name appears,
Grant and Logan, and our tears, Illinois, Illinois,
Grant and Logan, and our tears, Illinois.
When you heard your country calling, Illinois, Illinois,
Where the shot and shell were falling, Illinois, Illinois,
When the Southern host withdrew,
Pitting Gray against the Blue,
There were none more brave than you, Illinois, Illinois,
There were none more brave than you, Illinois.
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